2020
The year the world stopped
The year we all went home
The year we hoarded
We were the worst
We were all afraid
Global pandemic
No immunity
No vaccine
Quarantine
Shortages
Sickness
Sadness
Death
Hope
Recovery
Global effort
Race for a cure
Social Distance
Race for supplies
Companies retool
Race for a vaccine
We faced ourselves
The year we shared
Government stimulus
The year we stepped up
And fought for a better us
Saturday, March 28, 2020
Saturday, March 7, 2020
Looks Like 2020 is Shaping Up to be a Better Year
I stopped crying, finally. I feel like I've been AWOL for a long time. I feel like I need to learn how to write again after so long. So....random stuff it is.
My bread machine died. Well, actually, the post fell out of the pan, which means the seal is shot. No chance to replace the pan. No one has it, not the company or anyone else. So I decided I will learn to make bread without the machine. I mean, I used the machine as a dough mixer. No, I don't have a stand mixer and I don't intend to buy one. As it turns out, I probably only need a different shaped bowl and a silicon dough scraper. I've been on the hunt for one. My daughter says Bed Bath & Beyond has them. At least I want to try that before springing for another counter top real estate grabbing bread machine.
My friend lists a blog on making bread. Artisan Bread in Five
Yes, I just found that, which shows how long I've not been myself.
With the better weather my hubby and I have been going for more walks. We enjoyed Kohler-Andrea State Park just south of Sheboygan, our first time walking there.
My bread machine died. Well, actually, the post fell out of the pan, which means the seal is shot. No chance to replace the pan. No one has it, not the company or anyone else. So I decided I will learn to make bread without the machine. I mean, I used the machine as a dough mixer. No, I don't have a stand mixer and I don't intend to buy one. As it turns out, I probably only need a different shaped bowl and a silicon dough scraper. I've been on the hunt for one. My daughter says Bed Bath & Beyond has them. At least I want to try that before springing for another counter top real estate grabbing bread machine.
My friend lists a blog on making bread. Artisan Bread in Five
Yes, I just found that, which shows how long I've not been myself.
With the better weather my hubby and I have been going for more walks. We enjoyed Kohler-Andrea State Park just south of Sheboygan, our first time walking there.
We plan to go back after it greens up.
Update on my plants. I have been trying to refine my collection so that I can concentrate on my favorites, but I keep finding more favorites. I have some duplicates that will be going to new homes this spring. A few of my favorites:
My Jades
My Lithops bloomed!
My little Parodia Haselbergii cactus bloomed, too!
I am especially proud of the blooms. As an indoor window sill grower I have been told countless times that cacti and succulents won't bloom indoors. I like to give other indoor growers hope.
I have a few other succulent types, plus some Oxalis, my other love. Recently I ordered Oxalis Irish Mist. I've had my eye on this one for quite awhile. The bulbs ship in April. This is not my picture. It's from a catalog.
Photo credit Brent & Becky's Bulbs
Of course all of my plants wish they had front row seating on my window sills. Sometimes I need to rotate them.
In other news, my daughter and her hubby are getting close to finishing their dream home. Maybe this month they can move in.
That's all for today, will write more later, maybe showcase some of my succulents.
Monday, November 11, 2019
Just Some Random Thoughts
Some other drafts I never published. From a few months ago:
I still struggle with bouts of sadness and moodiness. I heard something the other day.
"It is far better to remember the wonderful person that you lost than to remember that you lost a wonderful person." Martin Lewis on the loss of his mother.
I'm trying to work toward that.
I am so grateful for my husband and my older daughter, for the perseverance and patience they show toward me in my journey of grief.
I still struggle with bouts of sadness and moodiness. I heard something the other day.
"It is far better to remember the wonderful person that you lost than to remember that you lost a wonderful person." Martin Lewis on the loss of his mother.
I'm trying to work toward that.
I am so grateful for my husband and my older daughter, for the perseverance and patience they show toward me in my journey of grief.
I Promised I would Write More
This is the post I wrote as a follow-up. It sat there all summer. Sorry. Every time I would think about writing it was the wrong time. Then I thought...who reads this stuff anyway. But today I was reading my other blog from Crescent City and I realized, I do. So here is the one from earlier. I'm not adding anything, just publishing it. I'll go from there.
So...the Victoza. It's expensive, but the difference it's making in my life is worth it. Remember I wrote about feeling like I had no energy much of the time? It must have been the Glipizide. I was also having muscle pain throughout my back as I tried to wash the dishes. I was also noticing weakness in my arms and a lack of energy. It must have been the Glipizide. I also had developed a large belly. Completely not normal for me! I couldn't get under 150 pounds. At 5' 7", 154 is a normal BMI for me, but I hated the belly. Must have been the Glipizide. I'm down to 145 without even trying. The only thing I don't like is how hollow my cheeks are.
That update was from some time ago. It sat there as a draft all this time. Anyway, still doing on on the Victoza but at first I was not eating well. I dropped weight too fast. My hair started falling out in July. Medication? Stress? Malnutrition? My thyroid test says normal but that's just one test. Don't know yet.
Victoza is expensive. My insurance pays for most of it but I'm set to fall into the coverage gap next month. I applied to Novo Nordisk for help. I hope they approve me. (Note...they did)
The nice thing about this medication is it doesn't cause dangerous lows like Glipizide.
In other "news", I was completely exhausted and stressed by the time hubby's parents left. Language barrier, different culture, old way of thinking, superstitions, you name it. And his mom is hard of hearing, so everyone needs to raise their voice to talk to her. I'm an only child who came from a home where no one yelled unless I was in trouble. And the TV had to be on from the moment they got up until his mom decided to go to bed at 11 or Midnight. And she kept trying to feed me at night, because she thought I didn't eat in the morning, because I ate before they got up, because I just have a bowl of cereal, not a whole table of things like cheese, bread, jam, coffee, tea, sugar, lemon and all the plates and spoons to go with it. And then there is the big meal of the day, lunch, and then dinner. But they aren't picky, they will eat what we eat to make it easy on me, except, not really. They felt bad, tried to help, because I'm doing everything. I'm not even going there.
So...the Victoza. It's expensive, but the difference it's making in my life is worth it. Remember I wrote about feeling like I had no energy much of the time? It must have been the Glipizide. I was also having muscle pain throughout my back as I tried to wash the dishes. I was also noticing weakness in my arms and a lack of energy. It must have been the Glipizide. I also had developed a large belly. Completely not normal for me! I couldn't get under 150 pounds. At 5' 7", 154 is a normal BMI for me, but I hated the belly. Must have been the Glipizide. I'm down to 145 without even trying. The only thing I don't like is how hollow my cheeks are.
That update was from some time ago. It sat there as a draft all this time. Anyway, still doing on on the Victoza but at first I was not eating well. I dropped weight too fast. My hair started falling out in July. Medication? Stress? Malnutrition? My thyroid test says normal but that's just one test. Don't know yet.
Victoza is expensive. My insurance pays for most of it but I'm set to fall into the coverage gap next month. I applied to Novo Nordisk for help. I hope they approve me. (Note...they did)
The nice thing about this medication is it doesn't cause dangerous lows like Glipizide.
In other "news", I was completely exhausted and stressed by the time hubby's parents left. Language barrier, different culture, old way of thinking, superstitions, you name it. And his mom is hard of hearing, so everyone needs to raise their voice to talk to her. I'm an only child who came from a home where no one yelled unless I was in trouble. And the TV had to be on from the moment they got up until his mom decided to go to bed at 11 or Midnight. And she kept trying to feed me at night, because she thought I didn't eat in the morning, because I ate before they got up, because I just have a bowl of cereal, not a whole table of things like cheese, bread, jam, coffee, tea, sugar, lemon and all the plates and spoons to go with it. And then there is the big meal of the day, lunch, and then dinner. But they aren't picky, they will eat what we eat to make it easy on me, except, not really. They felt bad, tried to help, because I'm doing everything. I'm not even going there.
Sunday, May 26, 2019
AWOL for a LONG Time
I guess I have a bazillion reasons why I haven't posted in so long. Or not. Because I don't remember them all. I will try to do a catch up list.
- I packed up all of the family photos and emptied the guest room. The beds got delivered the end of March and the room was all done ahead of time. I took pictures but currently they are lost in space. Well, not really.
- I saw my doc in April and she changed my medications. I had not been doing well on Glipizide. I am now taking Victoza. Details in another post.
- Hubby bought tickets so he could fly to Kosovo and fly back here with his parents.
- Hubby's parents have been here a month and will fly home June 24th.
- We took hubby's parents to the Dells. It was nice, but tears were rolling down my checks on the way there and back. Memories, memories, memories.
- Hubby and his dad got to go to the Indy 500 today!
- May is a difficult month. My second daughter was born in May. May was the last month of her life of 41 years. May is the month my first daughter got married. May is Mother's Day.
I will write more later, I promise. I'm tired. Going to bed. Hubby and his dad come home tomorrow.
Naten e mir
Wednesday, February 20, 2019
Just Checking In
Today is snowing and blowing. More snow coming Saturday, with a chance of freezing rain. Not fun. We are looking forward to spring. I can't say that enough.
Diabetic class #2 is tomorrow. I hope I learn something useful. Mostly I just learn that the way I need to eat is the way I can't eat. Nuts! Fish! More nuts! More fish! Snack on nuts! I love nuts but I can't freakin eat nuts. I mostly hate fish.
I ate a big salad. It helped. I also nosh on raw cauliflower. I make a dip from sour cream and onion powder, with some salt. Yeah, fattening but what to do. I chew gum. That gets my mind off snacking. However I have real issues with going to bed hungry, like not being able to sleep. Raw veggies are not the ideal snack before bed. Ugh. I test 2 times per day, once in the morning (fasting) and once at bedtime. I need to wait 2 hours after eating before testing. So if I eat at 7 pm and snack at 9 I'm good to test between 11 pm and midnight. The problem happens if I'm hungry at midnight, or I test and I'm under 120. Yeah, that should be fine for most people, but I have woken up too low (risk from Glipizide). So I have half a glass of milk and a small carb. Fasting glucose is a crap shoot. It's usually high. Exercise would help. I know that.
I'm 150 pounds right now. I would like to get under 150, maybe 145 to 148. It's difficult. Glipizide causes a 5 to 10 pound weight gain. I went up to 160 after starting that medication, and I am happy to be back down. Anyway, I'm 5'6" tall so my BMI is normal, but any and all fat I have is attached to my stomach. Weird.
I take the generic form of Prilosec. My nurse friend had a fit when she found out. She told me I will have bone loss for sure. She said my calcium supplements won't be absorbed. I don't take calcium supplements. I've also never broken a bone. I see my doc in April. I'll talk to her. Without the prilosec I can't eat anything without noshing on Tums, which make me horribly constipated. I also don't miss being rudely awakened at night breathing in stomach acid. It's horribly painful and frightening, and I need to sit up and cough for an hour or more. Without the Prilosec I can't use even a drop of oil, nor can I take vitamin D or krill oil.
In spite of all this, I am doing better. The sadness is starting to drift away as the days get longer.
My hubby has an opportunity to advance at work, in a different department. He is looking to make the switch after vacation this spring.
Well, I need to do some stuff, so I will sign off for now.
Diabetic class #2 is tomorrow. I hope I learn something useful. Mostly I just learn that the way I need to eat is the way I can't eat. Nuts! Fish! More nuts! More fish! Snack on nuts! I love nuts but I can't freakin eat nuts. I mostly hate fish.
I ate a big salad. It helped. I also nosh on raw cauliflower. I make a dip from sour cream and onion powder, with some salt. Yeah, fattening but what to do. I chew gum. That gets my mind off snacking. However I have real issues with going to bed hungry, like not being able to sleep. Raw veggies are not the ideal snack before bed. Ugh. I test 2 times per day, once in the morning (fasting) and once at bedtime. I need to wait 2 hours after eating before testing. So if I eat at 7 pm and snack at 9 I'm good to test between 11 pm and midnight. The problem happens if I'm hungry at midnight, or I test and I'm under 120. Yeah, that should be fine for most people, but I have woken up too low (risk from Glipizide). So I have half a glass of milk and a small carb. Fasting glucose is a crap shoot. It's usually high. Exercise would help. I know that.
I'm 150 pounds right now. I would like to get under 150, maybe 145 to 148. It's difficult. Glipizide causes a 5 to 10 pound weight gain. I went up to 160 after starting that medication, and I am happy to be back down. Anyway, I'm 5'6" tall so my BMI is normal, but any and all fat I have is attached to my stomach. Weird.
I take the generic form of Prilosec. My nurse friend had a fit when she found out. She told me I will have bone loss for sure. She said my calcium supplements won't be absorbed. I don't take calcium supplements. I've also never broken a bone. I see my doc in April. I'll talk to her. Without the prilosec I can't eat anything without noshing on Tums, which make me horribly constipated. I also don't miss being rudely awakened at night breathing in stomach acid. It's horribly painful and frightening, and I need to sit up and cough for an hour or more. Without the Prilosec I can't use even a drop of oil, nor can I take vitamin D or krill oil.
In spite of all this, I am doing better. The sadness is starting to drift away as the days get longer.
My hubby has an opportunity to advance at work, in a different department. He is looking to make the switch after vacation this spring.
Well, I need to do some stuff, so I will sign off for now.
Monday, February 18, 2019
Energy One Day, Dead Battery The Next
That's how I feel. One day I'm on a roll. Happy, energetic, got a lot done. Next day I have no motivation. Too cold to open windows. No energy. Pushing myself to do anything.
Slowly I am making progress on cleaning the spare bedroom. I just need to finish the closet and organize my crafts. Oh, and finish the photo album for my daughter. It's so hard not to get depressed. Literally everyone in the photos are dead except me and my older daughter. My more recent photos are digital. If I can just get through the sad pictures I can move on to the living.
Sometimes I wish we lived closer to my daughter, but...Indiana. HUMID hot summers, smoggy air, and no branch of hubby's company there to transfer to.
I don't know if I mentioned my hubby's parents are coming for a two month visit, thus the reason I am doing so much cleaning and organizing. Before they come I need to move all my plants into the small room where I have a few plants in the east window. Not thrilled, but there is no other way.
I have no idea what to expect with this visit. My hubby's mom is fond of me but who knows how 2 months together here will pan out. Neither of hubby's parents speak English and they do things the old way. Hubby is flying there in April, staying 10 days and then he and his parents are flying here together. It will be their first time flying. Airports are huge. I'm happy he is going to help them.
At least I don't need to make pita (Albanian spinach feta pie) from scratch. We buy a good similar one frozen from a store in Milwaukee.
Other than that, if we stock up on Bulgarian cheese, tomatoes, pickled peppers and other "salads" in jars, Albanian sausage (suxhuk) (pronounced soojuk) eggs and bread then I think I've got it covered. We plan to take them out to eat and sightseeing.
Slowly I am making progress on cleaning the spare bedroom. I just need to finish the closet and organize my crafts. Oh, and finish the photo album for my daughter. It's so hard not to get depressed. Literally everyone in the photos are dead except me and my older daughter. My more recent photos are digital. If I can just get through the sad pictures I can move on to the living.
Sometimes I wish we lived closer to my daughter, but...Indiana. HUMID hot summers, smoggy air, and no branch of hubby's company there to transfer to.
I don't know if I mentioned my hubby's parents are coming for a two month visit, thus the reason I am doing so much cleaning and organizing. Before they come I need to move all my plants into the small room where I have a few plants in the east window. Not thrilled, but there is no other way.
I have no idea what to expect with this visit. My hubby's mom is fond of me but who knows how 2 months together here will pan out. Neither of hubby's parents speak English and they do things the old way. Hubby is flying there in April, staying 10 days and then he and his parents are flying here together. It will be their first time flying. Airports are huge. I'm happy he is going to help them.
At least I don't need to make pita (Albanian spinach feta pie) from scratch. We buy a good similar one frozen from a store in Milwaukee.
Other than that, if we stock up on Bulgarian cheese, tomatoes, pickled peppers and other "salads" in jars, Albanian sausage (suxhuk) (pronounced soojuk) eggs and bread then I think I've got it covered. We plan to take them out to eat and sightseeing.
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